Posts filed under ‘What I’m Watching’

ANTM is Back– and So Am I!

This blog has been in hibernation (and, I may move it over to Tumblr or Posterous… TBD) but with a new season of ANTM on the air, it can only mean one thing: it’s time to talk Tyra and tragic model moments!

Before we dive right in, let’s take a moment to gasp at the fact that yes, we are on SEASON 16 (!?@!) of America’s Next Top Mode. Season. Sixteen. Oh. My. God. Don’t worry, you don’t have to admit how many seasons you’ve watched. And re-watched. No one ever needs to know.

With that being said, this season started up with Tyra trying to mix things up a bit– she nixed the idea of airing castings (gasp! The horror! How can we mock all of the potential hopefuls and get a taste for the girls who may or may not make it?) Instead, Tyra and team conned the 14 model-maybes into thinking they had been rejected and then quickly notified them that they, had, in fact, made it to the next round. For some reason, an old boy band song keeps playing in my head… I think the lyrics go, “quit playing games with my heart.”

Moving on.

The girls photo and runway challenge were lumped into one– they would have to take photos whilst preparing for their runway show. Sneaky, eh? But that wasn’t the most devious part of the show. In fact, the most devious (and, albeit, the most hilarious portion) was the runway creative.

For this episode, the girls were given the opportunity to walk in an Alexander Wang show (I know, right?) rocking Erin Wasson’s jewelry line (she’s the guest judge). But here’s the kicker. They’re walking on 12″ planks, on water– in giant bubbles filled with confetti.

Fan-freaking-tastic.

Amazingly enough, out of 14 girls, only two fell. Missed the episode? Don’t worry, there’s video of the spills and thrills here.

All in all, the episode was a decent start to the season and, clearly shows Tyra trying to shake up the franchise just a bit (aside from the high-fashion prizes). It’s too soon to pick a favorite without the audition backstory, but I’m happy Andre Leon Talley is back for a second season!

 

Bonus: The episode also produced a classic Tyra line from the critique– one where you’re unsure as to whether or not its a compliment or a slap in the face: “This picture to me looks like a 19 year-old boy with makeup on, but that’s what I like about it.”

And, a ridiculous line from Nigel: “Nicole isn’t truly present in this shot. And the mouth is too tight it’s sort of like a cats bottom.” [puckers his face] Tyra: “A cat’s bottom? Nigel, how did you come up with a cat’s bottom?” Nigel: “I see cat’s bottom mouths all the time. People are like this” [puckers his face in a more dramatic way, as does Andre Leon Talley]

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February 23, 2011 at 11:38 pm Leave a comment

What happened to Miss J?

Apologies a million times over for not posting in ages, but it’s been, needless to say, a bit hectic.

Andre Leon Talley

Andre Leon Talley

Naturally, I’ve been keeping up with the regulars, and the question/thing that stands out to me the most is ANTM and the introduction of Andre Leon Talley.

My god, is he a breath of fresh air on the show because for once, there’s someone on the panel with Tyra who can actually shut. her. up. and, she knows she can’t say a damn thing about it because that man is close to a fashion god. For heaven’s sake, he’s sat second fiddle to none other than THE Anna Wintour where Tyra may have merely just posed for her.

The man has talent, and Tyra knows it. He has flare, and, he has an eye for the avant garde.

So I wholly welcome him to the show. (And, I wonder how long he’ll be able to tolerate her antics. Only time will tell.)

But what I DO want to know is, where on earth did they hide my adorable Miss J?

While his pedantic and childish “growing-bowtie” antics were laughable, they were just that– laughable and endearing. This season, he’s only surfaced less than a handful of times, which is actually quite sad. It makes you wonder– did he finally tick of the great Miss Tyra?

According to the Press Release, Miss J is quoted saying, “After cycles of watching the girls not get it right, I thought they would benefit more from my high heels’ and hands-on approach than my sitting in a chair judging their photos.”

Nevertheless, the girls this season are just as catty as ever, with some donning massive eyebrows like Raina; some thinking they’re tougher than the rest, like Angelea; the full figured model like Alexandra; and then Krista, the girl with great bone structure.

Clockwise: Raina, Angelea, Alexandra, Krista

With just a few more weeks left, I’m hoping for a few more Miss J sightings, a couple more wild comments from Andre Leon Talley that snap Tyra in shape, and, a serious tweazing of the eyebrows for Raina.

We’ll see what ANTM brings. In the words of Tyra, I’m sure it will be “Fierce”– or not.

May 12, 2010 at 12:32 pm Leave a comment

Review: True Beauty

TrueBeautyI’m two episodes into ABC’s “True Beauty” and I’m beginning to think that the show’s hosts are just as ugly on the inside as some of the contestants. I’m not sure why I’m surprised, considering the show is the brainchild of Ashton Kutcher and Tyra Banks– two people born to make you feel ugly.  

But we’re all supposed to think Vanessa Minnillo, Cheryl Tiegs (I thought Janice Dickinson was the first Supermodel– does Tyra really hate Janice THAT much that she wants to rob her of that title? DRAMA), and Nolé Marin are all legitimiately beautiful on the inside that they’re adequate judges of these other contestants? 

If you ask me, Vanessa, Cheryl, and Nolé should probably be contestants themselves. The only way I would have found this show “believable” (in the way that any superficial reality show can be believable) is if they had thrown in a judge who was known for their philanthropy and genuine heart. Instead, we were given three judges who are all superficially beautiful and essentially are no better than anyone else on the show. The words “pot” “kettle” and “black” definitely come to mind whilst watching. 

Don’t get me wrong– the show can be entertaining, but it’s not because the contestants are actually learning anything. Even when they’re disqualified for being ugly on the inside, the contestants don’t “get it” and argue with the judges decision– proving that the show makes no impact on their lives. 

The challenges devised are superficial at best– contrived and shallow, they don’t develop a sense of inner beauty, but instead merely touch on socially accepted standards of beauty– like donating money to a charity. If the show was truly interested in finding out who was a “True Beauty” they would send the contestants to a soup kitchen in couture gowns and challenge them to work the kitchen, keep the dress/garment clean, and make a friend. Contestants would maintain their superficial attributes because they’d be decked out in couture, but they’d also learn what it’s like to help another, and would be forced to foster a legitimate connection with someone they probably wouldn’t have connected with. 

In the end, I know the show is going to stay on it’s current course: fake people judged by even faker celebrities. All I can hope for is that at the end, Ashton Kutcher will jump out and yell that the judges got Punk’d and really they’re the most superficial of the bunch. 

Hey, now that would be good TV.

January 13, 2009 at 11:53 am 2 comments

Rachel Zoe returns for Season 2

The LA Times announced today that The Rachel Zoe Project will be returning for a second season.

The LA Times says:

Production has not yet begun, but expect new episodes of “Rachel Zoe,” produced by Original Media, to air in mid-2009.

No word yet on whether on-and-off-again rivals Brad and Taylor will be back, but as of October, when I last spoke to Zoe, both were still happily employed.

As much as it pained me to watch the show, I’d rather see Rachel Zoe return than a show like Stylista get renewed. Too bad they’re on competing networks and are both likely to come back in 2009. Maybe this season Rachel will actually use her knowledge for good and take some of those tips she offers on Piperlime and incorporate them into her show.

December 4, 2008 at 10:18 am 3 comments

Models, Stylists, catch-up, oh-my!

So it’s been a while since I’ve posted here, and I apologize. Life has been a trifle bit hectic and I just realized I never even posted about the season finale of America’s Next Top Model. So, let’s dive right in.

ANTM: Sigh, big surprise, it came down to McKey and someone else. Even bigger surprise? McKey won. (Can you sense the sarcasm?) Yes, I get that she has a unique look, and yes, I get that she’s the only one who has been fairly consistent throughout the show, but I can’t help but want someone else to win. Anyone else to win. Ok, maybe not anyone else– but you get the idea.

I think the part of the show that really irked me was the fact that at the end, they threw in the fact that she’s been modeling for years. I suppose it’s my own naivety to think that all of these girls are relative rookies and have little to no formal training as models (I prefer to think of all “reality TV” contestants as “raw” as opposed to what they really are– pseudo-actors), but I felt especially duped to find out about McKey’s training in the final moments of the FINAL episode of the season. Way to try to sway your audience, ANTM.

As far as I’m concerned, unless next season’s models are complete and utter trainwrecks, or Janice Dickinson comes back, ANTM won’t have a place in my TiVo. Farewell, Tyra. Your insane antics were fun… sorta.

danielle_1Stylista: I caught another episode of Stylista this past week and can’t help but cheer for Danielle, the girl who got the boot. For those of you vaguely familiar with the show, she was the “visual merchandiser” who brought up her weight all throughout the episode, “It’s All About Who You Know.” I’m all for rockin’ what you’ve got, but IMO, Danielle’s “freak out” when she was forced to pick something from the Elle closet to wear to the party was completely self-inflicted. If you’re unhappy with how you look, or feel uncomfortable, or other people are making you feel uncomfortable, go with the easy alternative– handbags and shoes. Grab and go, and get on with your life. Besides, who doesn’t love a great pair of shoes? 🙂

Weight issues and unnecessary drama aside, if I was Anne, I don’t think I’d hire any of these kids. Well, maybe Johanna. None of them seem to know their way around a layout, let alone a fashion house and it just seems like a death wish. Honestly, when I was in junior high in journalism/yearbook I could pull together a better looking page layout than what these kids are doing, and they supposedly have an “eye for design.”

Give me a break. Stylista just seems like yet another television scam adept at mocking fashion and publishing. Maybe one day someone will come up with a show that actually features smart people who know their shit. Oh wait, that wouldn’t be any fun to watch, and, would be called the real world. Sigh.

Demarchelier/ Glamour Magazine

Demarchelier/ Glamour Magazine

Britney Spears: Britney Spears has returned. I’m not going to pretend that I don’t adore her, but yay! I’m so happy that Britney at least looks healthy, though in MTV’s recent Brit documentary I couldn’t help but think that there was a special kind of sadness tucked away behind her eyes.

Britney’s team has been on a mad don’t-call-it-a-comeback media-blitz– hitting European media outlets, news magazines, Rolling Stone, and today on her 27th birthday, Britney performed on Good Morning America.

If you didn’t see her “Circus” acts on Good Morning America this morning she’s looking much better, but I hope the high-waisted hot-pants that she’s wearing as a part of her ringleader gettup doesn’t become a trend. Katy Perry already tried, and so did Madonna and thankfully neither of their influences have stretched further than the “costume” category, but Britney tends to have (or had) mass appeal… let’s hope fans opt for the super chic look of Brit Brit on this month’s Glamour instead of the three ring approach.

December 2, 2008 at 5:48 pm Leave a comment

ANTM: “Good Times & Windmills”

antm-final-3Sigh. Marjorie is gone.

Though I’m saddened by our loss, I’m comforted by the fact that she was totally and completely off her rocker in this last episode, drunk, disorderly, and awkwardly cocky.

What on earth happened to the sheepish and modest girl who we all loved and adored? Clearly all of our positive thoughts, urging her to “come out of her shell” were just a touch too strong and caused her to hit the bottle (and the bath tub with the boys), a bit hard.  

So now we’re down to the final three: McKey, Analeigh, and Samantha (the girl who I literally have to pause to remember the name of). 

I’d be willing to put money on it that the final two will be McKey and Analeigh– Samantha is just too blah to be what Tyra’s looking for, even if she does have the “perfect mouth.” Even when she’s done up, I can’t help but see “soccer mom” and Colgate ad. Whereas Analeigh and McKey just seem so much more versatile. 

Hands down I’m rooting for Analeigh, but I’d also be willing to bet that McKey is going to come out on top. Something just tells me that Tyra and the rest of the judges have a soft spot for the boxer gone model.

I guess we’ll just have to wait and see what next week and the pink runways have to bring.

November 12, 2008 at 11:08 pm Leave a comment

ANTM: “The Final Five”

Since we’re down to the final five, I figured it’s only fitting to break down each of the remaining models, based on their personality and performance. Each of these assessments are independent of tonight’s episode.

Let’s start with my least favorite: Elina.

America's Next Top ModelElina, Elina, Elina. Oh, how you remind me of a pseudo Megan Fox or Angelina Jolie. I’m so over your tired antics, your tattooed arms and body, and your cocky ways. If you actually tried, you not only have the potential to be good, BUT, you also might be a little more tolerable. Instead, you mope around and blame your obnoxious tendencies on being European, or a rebel, or expressing yourself, or whatever it is that’s your excuse du jour, and coast through. You should have been gone weeks ago.

America's Next Top ModelBut don’t, worry, Elina, i’s not just you that I dislike. I’m also quite over you, McKey, but am much more willing to let your “antics” slide because you have more talent than Elina and are typically less obnoxious. Yes, sometimes your mouth confuses me. It’s just so wide and prominent, and when they slap on red or wine lipstick on you, with your pale skin and your black hair, I just become captivated. And no, in this case, that’s NOT a good thing

America's Next Top ModelAnd then there’s Samantha, the girl I forget exists. You’re so completely commercial that it’s almost delightful. If the show was based solely on the ability to sell Crest White Strips and jeans, you’d have it in the bag. Sadly for you, it’s not. Most days you sneak by completely unnoticed, and I have a feeling the judges feel the same way I do. Occasionally, you take a kickass photo and that resonates long enough in the viewer or panel member’s mind to keep you around for a phase or two, and you coast by on your mediocre photos and in your mom outfits. But Samantha, my dear, step it up. This might cut it if you wanted to be homecoming queen or if you were pledging a sorority, but you’ve got to find some spunk if you want to pull it out and win.

America's Next Top ModelAhh, Marjorie. For so long, you were my favorite. You, and your awkward, hunchback ways. Your mousy demeanor was endearing and I was certain we’d get to witness you evolve as a human and as a model. By the end of the season I imagined a glorious, more confident model who had spunk and confidence, and did it with pride. And then there’s reality. In all honesty, Marjorie may have progressed as a model, but it’s only because she learned to embrace her humped back and timid stance. As a person? She’s in the exact same boat as she was week 1 when Mr and Ms J(ay) donned their silver space suits and scared the bejesuses out of all of the models. Marjorie, when you find your confidence, come find fashion, and you’ll go far.

America's Next Top ModelWhich leaves us with Analeigh— the girl-next-door beauty who can photograph amazingly well. Sure, she’s had some crappy photos, but the girl can take a critique well. From day one, the team thought that she’d be a sure bet with her ice skating background, but as we learned in last week’s episode, Analeigh said that this typically brings her down. No matter how she finds her stride (no pun intended), I’m glad she does because the girl has spunk. She’s dedicated and cute, and can work it– from both a commercial and a couture perspective. If I was on the panel, she’d be my bet.

And now for the results…

Shocking moment of the night? Elina is 18. The only time the girl has looked 18 is when she screamed.

Kudos of the night are definitely owed to Samantha, who’s photo looked exactly like a Calvin Klein ad campaign. Nicely done.

I’m so glad Elina got the boot… it’s about time. I just hope that Marjorie actually listens to Tyra’s advice, because she was right– she needs to be more confident if she’s ever going to make it in the modeling world.

November 5, 2008 at 9:35 pm Leave a comment

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